Tuesday, September 21, 2010
*LOVE : i still dont get it*
including the lucid adventures of drama and heaps of baggage from god knows emotionally where.
i come across a stand point where i cant figure if love or well, relationships actually work. is love considered salvation or an eternity of suffering to those who actually think they have it?
first off, defining love is harder than most people know. the damned coincidence that brains don't normally function where the heart is should already be a clue that defining emotions into categorized levels of word is not likely an appropriate way to do it. but seriously, how do we actually define love?
well, while most of us say whatever outrageous things they could about love like its an item you but from a store, i still basically think that its a imaginary figment of some lousy cartoon character to create a buzz out of its boredom. i basically think its surreal.
the initial thought would be wonderful, magical, and then further notions seep in. it's surreal. (mind you, even if i define it as something out of this world and seemingly unreal, i still believe its out there / neurotic ways of expounding these emotions equate to LOVE for me)
do relationships still work? does an actual faithful relationship still exist in this time and age? well, i just got home from a date with a really nice guy. he's taken. his boyfriend is out of the country. and while the boyfriend is away, im the temporary cumhole. does it work? i guess, it works for me. i dont have to go through the drama and hassle of reporting my daily routine to someone, i dont have to keep on thinking about a certain someone's day, if his ego is bruised at work or his manhood is slightly smaller cause some guy at the gym told him he's thin and all the crap that we get from a relationship. i have all the good things i want with a guy hence the dirty area. the sex is good, the conversations are great. so what else should i look for? so basically, it works for me.
now, the question is, does it work for him too? i mean, we go out, we fuck. what else does he get from it? just the sex and company? does it work for him the way it is for me? what about the emotional babbles from his boyfriend?
well, these are just random thoughts from a guy like me. a guy who has never been in an actual relationship. like seriously, the only relationships i have are the ones with hermes, balenciaga and ysl. other than those relationships, i doubt ive been in one. well, tell me what you think. i need enlightenment.