Saturday, July 17, 2010

*a conversation with my mother*

Feeling low and depressed have certainly been a friend to me lately. A certain conversation I had with my mother saught on bringing the truth in wisdoms been told. The emotions I’ve held on to was at the brink of fullness that a simple “how are you” which came from her made my tears ‘a bucket pour like never ending rain. Inevitable pain rattled me to the core. It came to a point where I couldn’t even speak.

I never felt the power of emotions up until that moment came. 24 years in this world and i never saw reality the way it should be seen. It is indeed as real as it could get.

Reminding myself of who I was and how I was before seemed like the best I could do. Trying to brush the bitterness under the rug yet at the end of the day, a mountain of it seeps into your system and crawls over you. I cried for days trying to figure out the things that aren happening to me. The damages I’ve accumulated on my own, the pain I’ve probably brought myself, and the problems I reaped for me.

The reality of it, nobody else is responsible for your life except you.

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